I think Oscars are bullshirt. They are not my super bowl. All my favorite movies never win...anything. Did Mortal Kombat 2: The Annihilation
win an Oscar for being the sweetest movie of the year in 1997? No. Did Bruce Campbell win an Oscar for most dope preformance as 'Ash' in 1992? No. Did Charles 'Brawn's Son' Bronson win a lifetime awesome achievement award? Again, the answer in no.And where Sly Stallone won an Oscar for Rocky
...he was snobbed for the movie,Oscar.
In fact, the ONLY awards that the 1991 movie Oscar was up for, were Razzies.Three of 'em, in fact. For such catagories as Worst Actor (Sylvester Stallone), Worst Director (John Landis), and Worst Supporting Actress (Marisa Tomei). Which, in my opinion is pretty harsh...Oscar is actually pretty funny. Just misunderstood.
What I actually can't understand is how Marisa Tomei won a fucking OSCAR just two years later(1993) for the 1992 screen gem My Cousin Vinnie
as Best Supporting Actress. I'm pretty sure it was the same part. Seriously, I say...what, what, in the butt? I really wished The Academy woulda waited one more year for Untamed Heart
. Now, that...that my friends, was a performance.Seriously, it's like Sandra Bullock winning in 'Blind Side'... fucking really?
Oscars, you can eat a dick.
Blind Side is galaxy far, far, away from 'MasterClass'
Which brings us to today's new word...
MasterClass
MasterClass is anything gooder than good. How should I explain this?
Oh, I know.
I'm a liar. I will look you dead in the face and say things like, "Rats! Night of Terror
is fucking awesome! I love that movie, I can watch it 30 times inna row...it's the BEST!"Dudes, it's not the best. I mean, it's good. Highly watchable high. But, "The Best"...it is not. And, as much as I love the movie(cuzz I'm telling ya, even when yer seein' it... you won't believe it), I would actually have a hard time recommending it to perfect strangers
.However, if something is MasterClass, than I can safely say that it is of some redeeming value to even the most discriminating veiwer. (Which, as it turns out...I am not.) It is, in some very real fashion, the best of the best. The cinematography on 'Prime Cut
', for example, is MasterClass. As an example of Kung-Fu at it's outrageous best 'Master of the Flying Guillotine
' is (say it with me) MasterClass.Like, you might say, "Even through 'My Cousin Vinnie' was some bullshit, Marisa Tomei's tits
and body in The Wrestler
were fucking MasterClass."-are MasterClass.(In case yer reading this Marisa, I'm single.)
I hope that clears things up.
So let's not talk about The Oscars.
Let's talk about The Sweeties.
Yours,
Matt 'Master of the MasterClass Segway' DeLight
2010
PS, I love Untamed Heart
