Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Episode, FORE!

Hollywood ending. its all nice. The “Good Guy” Wins. Why wouldn’t he? Last night I watched “Law Abiding Citizen”. I thought, “It didn’t do well, maybe it took the other, everybody dies, everybody learns road.” Maybe it was a tough as nails thriller that took no prisoners and set the failing prison system on its ear. But noooooo, I was wrong. After an hour and a half of potential it decides the lawyer wins. But Why? He is the bad guy. If he isn’t, make it possible. I root for the “Bad Guy” the whole film. And that’s weird because it’s Gerard Butler. If I ever though I would root for him, it would be because of the booze. Fernet-Branca was what I was drinking tonight. In retrospect, it was more of a tequila movie. I still think I would have been disappointed. I think Jamie Foxx and Gerard Butler are to be commended. This film had the all the earmarks of a good thriller, but someone didn’t want to step on any toes...

(some time later)

Let me explain: I wrote that first paragraph completely loaded. I think I did okay. Anyway, Law Abiding Citizen is one of the movies we talk about in episode 4. I think 4 is pretty good. Matt drops knowledge about Freddy, opines about The Crazies, and almost cries over one less Corey. I can’t even keep up. I am excited about having the opportunity to talk about The Hidden, one of my old stand-by recommendations. We had so many problems recording it, I’m surprised we actually got it done. Sorry about the lack of beer openings. We drank all our beer during the first take. I hope you like it.

cheers, Jason

Monday, March 8, 2010

'Oscar' should have won an Oscar...

With all apologies to Jason.
I think Oscars are bullshirt. They are not my super bowl. All my favorite movies never win...anything. Did Mortal Kombat 2: The Annihilation win an Oscar for being the sweetest movie of the year in 1997? No. Did Bruce Campbell win an Oscar for most dope preformance as 'Ash' in 1992? No.  Did Charles 'Brawn's Son' Bronson win a lifetime awesome achievement award? Again, the answer in no.
And where Sly Stallone won an Oscar for Rocky...he was snobbed for the  movie,Oscar.
In fact, the ONLY awards that the 1991 movie Oscar was up for, were Razzies.Three of 'em, in fact. For such catagories as Worst Actor (Sylvester Stallone), Worst Director (John Landis), and Worst Supporting Actress (Marisa Tomei). Which, in my opinion is pretty harsh...Oscar is actually pretty funny. Just misunderstood.
What I actually can't understand is how Marisa Tomei won a fucking OSCAR just two years later(1993) for the 1992 screen gem My Cousin Vinnie as Best Supporting Actress. I'm pretty sure it was the same part. Seriously, I say...what, what, in the butt? I really wished The Academy woulda waited one more year for Untamed Heart. Now, that...that my friends, was a performance.
Seriously, it's like Sandra Bullock winning in 'Blind Side'... fucking really?
Oscars, you can eat a dick.

Blind Side is galaxy far, far, away from 'MasterClass'

Which brings us to today's new word...
MasterClass is anything gooder than good. How should I explain this?
Oh, I know.
I'm a liar. I will look you dead in the face and say things like, "Rats! Night of Terror is fucking awesome! I love that movie, I can watch it 30 times inna row...it's the BEST!"
Dudes, it's not the best. I mean, it's good. Highly watchable high. But, "The Best"...it is not. And, as much as I love the movie(cuzz I'm telling ya, even when yer seein' it... you won't believe it), I would actually have a hard time recommending it to perfect strangers.
However, if something is MasterClass, than I can safely say that it is of some redeeming value to even the most discriminating veiwer. (Which, as it turns out...I am not.) It is, in some very real fashion,  the best of the best. The cinematography on 'Prime Cut', for example, is MasterClass. As an example of Kung-Fu at it's outrageous best 'Master of the Flying Guillotine' is (say it with me) MasterClass.

Like, you might say, "Even through 'My Cousin Vinnie' was some bullshit, Marisa Tomei's tits and body in The Wrestler were fucking MasterClass."
-are MasterClass.(In case yer reading this Marisa, I'm single.)

I hope that clears things up.

So let's not talk about The Oscars.
Let's talk about The Sweeties.

Matt 'Master of the MasterClass Segway' DeLight

PS,  I love Untamed Heart

Episode 3, third time is a charm? Hmm...

Three whole episodes. I don’t know what to say. We are turning them out at a blistering rate. In this show we continue to plumb depths to find movies for you to watch. Matt continues his search for tough guy classics while I search the internet for the movies of my past. And somehow, we still manage to cram in something current. While we still struggle with the technology, we intend to maintain this pace figuring that the kinks will eventually work themselves out.

In this show we cover a lesser known 1972 Lee Marvin flick called Prime Cut. Matt talks about kung fu classic Master of the Flying Guillotine. And all I show up with is a watchable oughts thriller, The Highwaymen. Our pre-show pick was Zombieland. Finally, a zombie movie. Tune in and hear what we had to say. We also manage to inject some touching personal moments, folksy interruptions, and an awkward silence or two.

I would like to thank Modelo Especial beer for helping loosen us up. Can we get a beer sponsor? If anyone listening can help set that up we’ll do a whole show based on your favorite movies. We’ll wear patches, jackets, anything with a logo on it, anywhere we go, and mention what we are drinking several times a show, for free beer.

In the last podcast I briefly ranted that out of four trailers, 3 were remakes. I was wrong. all 4 were remakes. Thanks to Tyler for catching that. The fourth trailer was for Death at a Funeral. This is a remake of a Brit flick that is only 3 years old. So recent in fact that one of the actors is actually in both versions. Come on!

We need more feedback. Tell us what you like or hate. What do you want us to sit through before you waste your valuable time. If you just have technical advice, we can obviously use it. You can comment here or on Facebook. You can also email us a fatandskinnygo@gmail.com.

One more thing, did anyone notice that out of six Oscar picks in my Febuary 4th post, I called 5 in the 6 major categories? I’m just saying. And as far as Bullock taking best actress, sure why not, she is terribly likable.

Thanks for sticking with us. - Jason

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

What's with the beard?

Nothing takes me out of the moment faster than a bad beard or mustache. Why would you put a beard on a character that didn't look like they could grow facial hair or didn't grow one that was appropriate to their style. I understand that they can be a useful tool if you're trying to show the
passage of time or just how unkempt somebody is, and that's fine but I think that you should cast somebody that can grow the appropriate scruff or just don’t bother. And if you add the beard, don’t forget the undergrowth, or “neck beard”, no self respecting, hard-drinking, loose cannon cop is gonna shave his neck only. Unless it’s a style choice. In that case the actor better be able to grow a ‘stache or beard. Matt Damon’s mustache in “The Informant!” is a perfect example. I like Matt, a gifted actor, but can’t rock a ‘stache. He doesn’t even look like he has to shave. Fresh faced guys like that just don’t do well with a push broom. And if his character did grow a mustache, I think he would trim it better. The guy drives a Porsche and a Lamborghini. It would have been better to go sans flavor saver.

Fake beards are tough enough and now we have Hi-Def. We can see a bad beard a mile away. Note to Spielberg, next time you are erasing the guns out a film, check for bad beards.  These days, Hollywood is having a hard enough time turning out a movie worth watching, why make it harder. I know it may seem knit-picky, but dammit, don’t we deserve more for our 10-20 dollar movie ticket?

Here is a cheat sheet for Hollywood.

Actors who can wear facial hair: Jack Black, Zack Galifianakis, Chuck Norris, Daniel Day Lewis, Glenn Close.

Actors who should not: Matt Damon, Matthew Fox, Brad Pitt, Corey Feldman, Jake Gyllenhaal.

Van Dykes, Goatees, Mullets, long hair in general, groomed stubble, sideburns, Handlebars, and Fu Manchus are okay on certain character parts upon review, but rarely acceptable. Please help me by emailing a list of your least/most favorite beards at fatandskinnygo@gmail.com or in the comment box below. I have also started a discussion on Facebook. Maybe we can solve this problem once and for all.

Cheers - Jason

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Episode 2!

Episode “Deux” is up! That way people can’t say “it sounds like number 2”. Actually, I guess deux is not much better. This time We cover Book of Eli, To Live and Die in L.A., (500)Days of Summer, and Universal Soldier: Regeneration. This is a perfect example one step forward, two steps back. Unbeknownst to Matt, I took the liberty of trying to edit this episode. Sorry Matt. I also added corrections at the end. Seemed like a good idea, but upon listening, I corrected a mistake that I edited out. Oh well, there is music at the end now.

I really wish we could have recorded the conversation we had upstairs immediately following the recording session. We were on fire. One piece of advice we received was we should be a further into our drinks before hitting record. Trust me though, when we finally get that fire in the podcast, it will be awesome to behold.

Matt really gets a big kudos for putting on his game face for the show because some asshole stole his bike. And if you know Matt, you know how Matt loved his bike.

Cheers buddy! - Jason

Listen to Episode #2